I often find it very helpful to write while in a meditative and reflective state.  On the morning of Thursday, September 10th, I was able to take some very intense emotions I was feeling, emotions that were causing me to say and do things I didn’t like, into Remembrance and meditation and then write about the situation from a higher perspective.

I feel called today to share that meditative writing session, unedited, with you.

Meditative Writing: Participation Without Presence

God can’t and won’t insulate us from our problems.

He gave us free will and therefore we cannot expect him to control our responses to any situation.

We are in control of how we respond, even though in the heat of the moment, that is often so incredibly hard to remember.

Emotions trigger our outward expressions, and color and influence our choice of words.

It can feel inauthentic to hide what we feel.

It is in those moments, moments when our intense emotional reactions are leading us rapidly down a path that we do not wish to be on, that we must pause long enough to remember.

Sometimes the situation will require a significant pause and perhaps even removing yourself from the environment you’re presently in.

Other times a momentary turn toward within will be enough to re-center yourself and respond from thoughts that are more aligned with your higher self.

Even the most enlightened masters of the Earth can allow an emotional thought process to get away from them.

I’ve often thought long and hard about how incredibly challenging the human aspects of my condition make my life at times.

Yet I could never part with my feelings completely, to live on a completely even keel, never sensing fluctuations (or even wild swings) in my mood, for that would be self-denial.

I would lose the opportunity to vividly grasp those situations that matter most in me.

By experiencing a negative, I’m able to also detect the positive.

For example, my deeply emotional pain felt when it appeared as though my husband Michael was going to present my one and only (younger) brother with a letter written late at night the midnight before, accompanied by his late grandfather’s military medal, without allowing me to be present and unaccompanied by any explanation at all, that led me to this moment of two new understandings – one personal and one more universal.

1. We are not in control of what happens but we can choose to practice being in control of how we react to what happens.  It’s another form of practicing Remembering.

2.  There aren’t many men in my life who mean as much to me as my husband and brother.  My father is the only other man I would group with Michael and Gary on a moment’s notice.

If I take a moment to peacefully turn within…

I realize what my emotions were conveying in an instant, albeit in a chaotic and painful way.

I’m moved, deeply moved, by Michael’s forthcoming gesture.

And my ego wants to make it somehow out to be about me or to involve/include me.

After the past week’s like transforming experiences, my ego feels excluded.  Not surprising since I’ve been striving to annihilate it whenever it shows up in my dialogues with my Guides, Angels, and Visitors from the Other Side.

Since I’ve established clear boundaries in that sphere/arena, I’m always remembering to discard and distrust ego-like thinking when in that state of total connectedness.

Within these familial circumstances? Ahh. Not yet so experienced at that part.

Poor ego, you don’t want to be left out.

excluded.

discarded.

left behind.

I can relate.  I can understand.  That’s how aligned we were in that moment.

I didn’t want to miss out on that moment either.  But now, sitting still and silent in my Remembrance chair…

It’s so clear to me.

Even if I’m not a physical witness to the giving of the gift and letter, no one can deny me the feelings that well up within me when I envision the process unfolding.

Michael doesn’t have to invite me along in order for me to feel moved, so moved, on so many levels, by his act.

So now, I sit, alone, in peaceful observation of the beauty and love of this event.

And I’ll also contemplate and reflect upon my own lesson and forgive myself for overreacting before remembering.

And yet, another insight as well… if there is a feeling that wants to explode, it doesn’t have to explode onto others.

It can come out in the company of me alone to be processed.

***

So there you have it.  The product of one of my meditative writing sessions.  I feel a bit odd (perhaps even exposed) sharing this today, but also feel very clear in my heart that it is what I’m most wanting to share, here at My Remembering Place, today.

Thank you for reading.  If you feel moved to comment, I would be especially grateful.  This piece of writing comes from deep within my heart and any witnessing you can offer me would be lovely.

And if you feel moved, perhaps you’d like to share as well?

Perhaps you could share a time when you sat and wrote in meditation and how you found it helpful…

Or maybe a story about a time when you wanted to explode and unload your emotions upon a loved one, but instead turned within and processed them for yourself…

Or maybe you could share a time when you did explode and unload your emotions upon someone else, forgetting in that moment, as I did, to first remember and explore what the emotions were attempting to tell you at that instant…

Thank you for being here!